Fighting Passivity
Holy moly. I was preparing to write this blog post with something completely different in mind to write about. But then I sat down and read a daily devotion from "My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers and that totally changed. The devotion today was called "Taking the Initiative Against Depression," and man, did it speak to me.
Like many people out there, I have a tendency to struggle with depression. This is a really hard thing for me to admit, as I like to hide my problems and pretend that nothing is wrong. But so often, I am overcome with my depression and it tends to consume me. Naturally, these times cause a serious hit in my quiet time with Jesus, resulting in even more issues.
As many would point out, depression is a mental illness and not a choice. Not too many people I know would choose to be depressed. So do not think that I am trying to say that those who suffer from depression are in the wrong or should not seek out medical help, because I do not feel that way at all. However, my eyes were opened to something today: how I respond to my depression IS my choice. And when I allow for it to stop me from reaching out to my Lord daily, I am CHOOSING to live in sin. I am sitting around, focused in a "me" mentality and looking at my problems.
It is absolutely wrong of me to wallow in self-pity, waiting for Jesus to come pick me up out of my issues. Am I saying that I should not have faith that He will restore me? Absolutely not. However, I have to face the fact that Jesus calls me to act.
I have to look at the story of Jesus healing an invalid in John 5. There was a pool called Bethesda, where an angel would come stir up the waters, and whoever entered them at that time would be healed. Jesus approached a man there who had been an invalid for 38 years.
38 years. That is such a long time to be suffering. Certainly Jesus was about to show up on the scene and heal this man instantly. However, the very first thing he does upon approaching the man is ask, "Do you want to get well (v. 6)?" This sounds like such a silly question. Of course the man wants to get well! Who wants to ail for such a long time? However, the man does not respond with a "Yes, of course!" He says, "Sir, I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me (v. 7)."
Wow. This may not seem like much to you, but to me it was powerful. How often am I guilty of making excuses as to why I am not doing well, or why I am living in sin? I find every excuse in the book to cover for my passivity and lack of taking action. Ironically, the very next thing Jesus says to the man is, "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk (v. 8)."
Jesus does NOT want me sitting around, making excuses as to why I am hurting or why my problems haven't been fixed. He wants me to get up, pick up my mat, and walk to him. Some days that walk may be a hobble, or even a crawl, but there is not one reason why I should not be making my way before the throne each and every day, taking my problems to the only one who can fix them. He is able. He is willing. All I have to do is come to Him. There is not an excuse out there as to why I cannot take that simple act of obedience.
Like many people out there, I have a tendency to struggle with depression. This is a really hard thing for me to admit, as I like to hide my problems and pretend that nothing is wrong. But so often, I am overcome with my depression and it tends to consume me. Naturally, these times cause a serious hit in my quiet time with Jesus, resulting in even more issues.
As many would point out, depression is a mental illness and not a choice. Not too many people I know would choose to be depressed. So do not think that I am trying to say that those who suffer from depression are in the wrong or should not seek out medical help, because I do not feel that way at all. However, my eyes were opened to something today: how I respond to my depression IS my choice. And when I allow for it to stop me from reaching out to my Lord daily, I am CHOOSING to live in sin. I am sitting around, focused in a "me" mentality and looking at my problems.
It is absolutely wrong of me to wallow in self-pity, waiting for Jesus to come pick me up out of my issues. Am I saying that I should not have faith that He will restore me? Absolutely not. However, I have to face the fact that Jesus calls me to act.
I have to look at the story of Jesus healing an invalid in John 5. There was a pool called Bethesda, where an angel would come stir up the waters, and whoever entered them at that time would be healed. Jesus approached a man there who had been an invalid for 38 years.
38 years. That is such a long time to be suffering. Certainly Jesus was about to show up on the scene and heal this man instantly. However, the very first thing he does upon approaching the man is ask, "Do you want to get well (v. 6)?" This sounds like such a silly question. Of course the man wants to get well! Who wants to ail for such a long time? However, the man does not respond with a "Yes, of course!" He says, "Sir, I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me (v. 7)."
Wow. This may not seem like much to you, but to me it was powerful. How often am I guilty of making excuses as to why I am not doing well, or why I am living in sin? I find every excuse in the book to cover for my passivity and lack of taking action. Ironically, the very next thing Jesus says to the man is, "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk (v. 8)."
Jesus does NOT want me sitting around, making excuses as to why I am hurting or why my problems haven't been fixed. He wants me to get up, pick up my mat, and walk to him. Some days that walk may be a hobble, or even a crawl, but there is not one reason why I should not be making my way before the throne each and every day, taking my problems to the only one who can fix them. He is able. He is willing. All I have to do is come to Him. There is not an excuse out there as to why I cannot take that simple act of obedience.
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